You know it’s bad when your therapist asks you if it’s “that time of the month.”
Now, before you react the way I typically would (i.e. “ugh, that is so sexist and judgmental and rude!”), keep in mind that my therapist is a soft, compassionate woman.
So… have I just been kinda fucking crazy lately? In a word: YES.
*cry face* BUT IT’S BECAUSE I LOVE MY BUSINESS. I love my clients, I love my team, I love every single thing about Your Hot Copy. But what I don’t love is that sometimes (okay, most of the time) I don’t know how to say “listen business, today is just about ME.” Loving my business and caring so hard makes it very hard for me to let go, take care of myself, and have a life.
To some extent, my business is my baby, so I’m not about to leave it in the car with the windows rolled up while I go shopping for new shoes. That would be neglectful and abusive! But if I’m being very honest: I AM in a place where I CAN technically let go more, step back, and work on the big picture instead of the small details.
My team is here to support me, to keep things running, and to allow me to focus on being the CEO instead of the service provider.
Well, I am wholeheartedly acknowledging (out loud and in public) that stepping into the role of CEO is a hard transition to make.
So hard it’s made me all “crazy, stupid, love.”
So… HOW do you put the kibosh on the crazy and reel your sanity (and money) back in?
Especially during the holiday season?
Xanax and wine.
The end! See y’all in 2017!
I’m kidding, I’m kidding. OR AM I??!!!
I am. I wouldn’t leave you hanging like that.
Here are the actual, substance-free solutions that help me every single time.
- Lean on me (or your girlfriends). I personally thank GAWD that I have friends like Jordana Jaffe who are unicorn mamas in their spare time. Her own experience with panic and anxiety has made her (and every community she’s ever built) my personal saving grace. Last week I had some mornings where I was dripping snot crying from feeling overwhelmed. BUSINESS ISN’T ALWAYS SEXY, YOUZ GUYZ. Without her support, and the support of those she gathered for times of need, I’d be LOST. Knowing you’re not alone when you accidentally make some bad choices, overcommit, or just feel crappy or stressed is ERRYTHANG.
- Delete, delete, delete. Not your writing, boo! Just that shit on your calendar or to-do list that’s NOT a priority right now. How do you know what to delete? Go through your list of to-do’s and events and remove anything that makes you go “ugh, no” or “yes, but not right now.” Cancel or delegate anything in the “ugh, no” and reschedule anything in the “yes, but not right now.” Give yourself permission to cancel commitments so you can breathe. This is a hard one for me, because integrity is a HUGE value of mine. I want to do what I say I’m going to do — but once in awhile, it’s ok not to. 😉
- Take care of YOU. You know all that space you just freed up by deleting stuff? Use that to take care you! Do you need to schedule a therapy appointment, an acupuncture session, or a massage? Make sure you build in rest, care, and recovery or you are going to be like that overstretched rubberband and SNAP.
- Get flexible. I don’t mean “do yoga,” although that’s also a great idea! I mean – detach yourself from doing things the way you think they “should” happen. I don’t know about YOU, but I assume that I know how things are supposed to happen, and when. As a strategic thinker I love to plan and map things out, but when it comes to things changing – I’m kinda like 90s dial-up “beep boop beep beep” — does not connect. I am still learning the art of flexibility. Rubber bands are flexible, as long as they are not stretched too thin. Be the rubber band.
- Accept a new timeframe. Things don’t happen on your time, they happen on their time. So try as we might, some things are simply not going to happen on the schedule you’re hoping for. With business, know that the most important things will happen on deadline but the rest WON’T. So know that, be okay with it, and when shit feels crazy – try giving yourself more time.
- For gawd’s sake, go to the gym. Or dance class, or yoga, or take a walk. Endorphins are the shit and solve most of the problems we make up in our head. Connect with your body, and work it out, and you can usually sweat out the crazy. Fun fact: actually a certified Vixen Workout instructor! It’s my favorite way to sweat, and the more I do it, the better I feel. 😉
And then, of course, if all else fails, there is always Xanax and wine.
p.s. If my #1 made you go “ohhhh, I need a sisterhood of supportive lady bosses too!” then check out Jordana Jaffe’s amazing post about how to create your own right here. She’s the grand puba of community-building and makes the over overwhelming, extremely simple and doable. Check it out!